Teeheehee..
I vowed at around 4 this afternoon that I would go to bed early. I've been feeling a bit off lately, and just a few hours ago, I could literally see the walls, floor, and clocks melting. It was trippy. But, now it is midnight, and I IM'ing TheEnigma, and giggling like a 6 year old.
[23:55] TheEnigma: omg im so numb
[23:56] minx: hahah
[23:56] TheEnigma: i wish you were here to hit me with a brick or something it would be so fucking funny
[23:56] minx: haha, fuck the brick, i'll just use my shoes again :P
[23:56] TheEnigma: hehehe
"I wish you were here..." I love that. I'd just like to note, he's not one to show his emotions much. He's always made sure to never bait me too much, to give me too much notice of his feelings, as I do for him. It's just easier that way, what with the fact that he's still with his girlfriend. I'd rather not break them up. I feel bad for what I do, honest, I just...I've felt for him for so long. Anyway. He's careful with his words. Maybe it's because he's fucked up on the vicodins I sold him (I already know I'm going to hell), but for some reason that just doesn't really want to click with me.
"I'd rather not feel at all than be in continual pain. The only meaningful human interaction i get here and there, and it's not working." He posted this in his blog a few days ago, and it kind of hurt. I just don't know what to do, do I release some of my feelings more, be more like I want to be, instead of holding back?
He also posted "Seriously though, im glad you came to talk to me, and i think i knew where you were heading, but let's not destroy the family. I dont want to end up like the exiled. " Now, I'm not sure if he was talking to me or someone else. I just don't know, I just don't know...
At least I can enjoy the fact that he'll openly admit to me now that he misses me :) At least for the time being. I feel so bad for him...I feel sorry that his girlfriend is so mean to him. It hurts me to see him when he's depressed about her, drinking constantly to try and numb the pain. I'd rather him be with her and happy then with me and constantly thinking about her...I know that that's not good for him. Oh well. Enough about TheEnigma!
Over the course of the past couple of weeks, I have been busily trying to raise funds for my plans. I've decided I'm going to (attempt) to take over business in this town of mine, the drug business. I realize that at this point in my life, I have enough contacts with good enough sales that I can double my money every month, which is guaranteed, as I've already set up buyers for when I bring it up. So with little effort, in the next month I will have a little under an extra grand for spending money. When I eventually make prices absurdly low, and--
hehe, now I'm picking on him because he drinks like a gallon of milk a day. I told him he should invest in his own dairy cow, and apparently he is actually 'rofl'. I love making him laugh :)
--I'll still be making a profit, but now people won't need to scrounge so damn much for so little. Giving back to the people, man!
I lost my train of thought, being again distracted by you-know-who.
It is freezing in my room, I think i"m going to go turn myself into a burrito with my blankey. Hope everyone has sweet dreams and exciting days!
[23:55] TheEnigma: omg im so numb
[23:56] minx: hahah
[23:56] TheEnigma: i wish you were here to hit me with a brick or something it would be so fucking funny
[23:56] minx: haha, fuck the brick, i'll just use my shoes again :P
[23:56] TheEnigma: hehehe
"I wish you were here..." I love that. I'd just like to note, he's not one to show his emotions much. He's always made sure to never bait me too much, to give me too much notice of his feelings, as I do for him. It's just easier that way, what with the fact that he's still with his girlfriend. I'd rather not break them up. I feel bad for what I do, honest, I just...I've felt for him for so long. Anyway. He's careful with his words. Maybe it's because he's fucked up on the vicodins I sold him (I already know I'm going to hell), but for some reason that just doesn't really want to click with me.
"I'd rather not feel at all than be in continual pain. The only meaningful human interaction i get here and there, and it's not working." He posted this in his blog a few days ago, and it kind of hurt. I just don't know what to do, do I release some of my feelings more, be more like I want to be, instead of holding back?
He also posted "Seriously though, im glad you came to talk to me, and i think i knew where you were heading, but let's not destroy the family. I dont want to end up like the exiled. " Now, I'm not sure if he was talking to me or someone else. I just don't know, I just don't know...
At least I can enjoy the fact that he'll openly admit to me now that he misses me :) At least for the time being. I feel so bad for him...I feel sorry that his girlfriend is so mean to him. It hurts me to see him when he's depressed about her, drinking constantly to try and numb the pain. I'd rather him be with her and happy then with me and constantly thinking about her...I know that that's not good for him. Oh well. Enough about TheEnigma!
Over the course of the past couple of weeks, I have been busily trying to raise funds for my plans. I've decided I'm going to (attempt) to take over business in this town of mine, the drug business. I realize that at this point in my life, I have enough contacts with good enough sales that I can double my money every month, which is guaranteed, as I've already set up buyers for when I bring it up. So with little effort, in the next month I will have a little under an extra grand for spending money. When I eventually make prices absurdly low, and--
hehe, now I'm picking on him because he drinks like a gallon of milk a day. I told him he should invest in his own dairy cow, and apparently he is actually 'rofl'. I love making him laugh :)
--I'll still be making a profit, but now people won't need to scrounge so damn much for so little. Giving back to the people, man!
I lost my train of thought, being again distracted by you-know-who.
It is freezing in my room, I think i"m going to go turn myself into a burrito with my blankey. Hope everyone has sweet dreams and exciting days!
posted by Minx at 9:05 PM
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